As Good as a Boy or Better Than a Girl?

[Viv of Ginger Pop]

Manzy, Viv, my mother for one still has these 1950s values, bless her.

A couple of months ago I was doing a conservation task on a Nature Reserve not far from where my boyfriend lives - and he agreed to cook evening dinner.

I rang the doorbell, and he opened it, and just stared at the apparition before him. I honestly had been through a hedge backwards (and forwards), hair awry, my oldest, grungiest clothing - and reeking of a very fine bonfire.

"Some women" I explained "spend hour and hours making themselves up before seeing boyfriends on a Saturday night.... I haven't."

"It looks like you've been enjoying yourself" he replied.

I had. And dinner was very tasty. Three cheers for C21 century relationships!

Viv

[Belly]

Good point, Ming.

[Daisy]

Farmer's wives worked so hard they were very necessary to the success of the farm I think. Also size wasn't an issue back in the 40s & 50s! Aunt Rose was thin but then she wasn't looked on as a typical farmer's wife either!

[Belly]

Farmer's wives worked so hard they were very necessary to the success of the farm I think. Also size wasn't an issue back in the 40s & 50s! Aunt Rose was thin but then she wasn't looked on as a typical farmer's wife either!

Interesting. Many men I knew/know of a couple of generations back have told me they actively looked for a wife as today someone might employ a housekeeper. She had to be sensible, practical, good with figures (to help with household bills and accounts), a good plain cook, and pleasantly plain (or at least not pretty enough to attract too much attention which could be corrupting). They seem to have done this paritcularly if employing a separate housekeeper was beyond their means.

Men who wanted to get on in business, young merchant bankers etc, might marry someone decorative to flatter their boss and wheel their hostess trolleys around the dining room with a glamorous touch. I even know one man whose stunning American wife was partly 'chosen' because he wanted to get on in an American bank, unbeliveably this worked. A great pity as their children grew up with slightly skewed belief and value systems and an inability to love.

I write this slightly tongue in cheek but it applies to a great many I've met over the years at a concious and unconcious level.

[Belly]

Manzy, Viv, my mother for one still has these 1950s values, bless her.

A couple of months ago I was doing a conservation task on a Nature Reserve not far from where my boyfriend lives - and he agreed to cook evening dinner.

I rang the doorbell, and he opened it, and just stared at the apparition before him. I honestly had been through a hedge backwards (and forwards), hair awry, my oldest, grungiest clothing - and reeking of a very fine bonfire.

"Some women" I explained "spend hour and hours making themselves up before seeing boyfriends on a Saturday night.... I haven't."

"It looks like you've been enjoying yourself" he replied.

I had. And dinner was very tasty. Three cheers for C21 century relationships!

Viv

What a great answer from him, he sounds lovely. Loved your descriptions!

[Viv of Ginger Pop]

UGH!

My best friend John has just arrived having done the conservation task in the pourung rain today. The mud on the front of his trousers looks like he's had a horrible accident at the wrong side, and the overall effect of mud, sweat and stench from his wellies is totally disgusting.

I'm now doing the good female thing of cup of tea, dinner, clothes wash... everything except that I can't face giving him a welcoming kiss!

Viv

[lizarfau]

The other thing that bugs me is that in our family anyway it is accepted for men to go to the pub with friends while the 'women prepare the traditional meal at home. I always used to go to the pub too and then got the reputation as a shirker!

My husband's family is like this - well, not going off to the pub, but basically at functions food is prepared and cleared up by the women, while the men sit around drinking beer and talking about cricket. I've always sat with the men drinking beer and talking about cricket, because that's a lot more fun than buttering rolls or washing dishes, and like you have gained a reputation as a shirker. I did actually help prepare the food at my mother-in-law's funeral, which prompted some comments (from the women), but would far rather have been imbibing and discussing whether England might be able to put up a reasonable challenge in next year's Ashes ...

I do think, though, that a lot of women actually enjoy preparing food, Anne-style, and get pleasure from seeing other people eating what they've created. The trouble is they put pressure on those of us who see it as a complete and utter bore to be the same way ...

[jen]

This morning Rosie quoted me a bit from a book about the Ideal Home Exhibition from 1955 which advised women "always remember that your husband's conversation is more important than your own".



It is so easy to forget how much society changed in Blyton's lifetime, and how far we have progressed since!

Viv

Oh, so that's what I did wrong!! Three cheers and a ginger beer to my impending divorce!!!