Jokes
- IceMaiden
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Re: Jokes
Two robbers hold up a liquor store. One of them picks up a bottle and asks, "is this whiskey?!". The other one replies "Well not as whiskey as wobbing a bank".
- Boatbuilder
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Re: Jokes
"You can't change history as that won't change the future"
John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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- Boatbuilder
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Re: Jokes
Q: What is a tin soldier that has lost an eye?
A: Tin Solder
A: Tin Solder
"You can't change history as that won't change the future"
John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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- Boatbuilder
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Re: Jokes
What is the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of its paws, whereas a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
A cat has claws at the end of its paws, whereas a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
"You can't change history as that won't change the future"
John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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- Lucky Star
- Posts: 11496
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- Location: Surrey, UK
Re: Jokes
Groan.
"What a lot of trouble one avoids if one refuses to have anything to do with the common herd. To have no job, to devote ones life to literature, is the most wonderful thing in the world. - Cicero
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Re: Jokes
There's a sign in my local park that reads:
'Please do not cycle on the grass. You may injure a young child or elderly person.'
I'm annoyed about the cycling, but at least they've provided an alternative activity.
'Please do not cycle on the grass. You may injure a young child or elderly person.'
I'm annoyed about the cycling, but at least they've provided an alternative activity.
DSR
- Anita Bensoussane
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Re: Jokes
Good one, Dsr!
"Heyho for a starry night and a heathery bed!" - Jack, The Secret Island.
"There is no bond like the bond of having read and liked the same books."
- E. Nesbit, The Wonderful Garden.
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"There is no bond like the bond of having read and liked the same books."
- E. Nesbit, The Wonderful Garden.
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-
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Re: Jokes
I'm sure this would be the wonderful Tim Vine's contribution to the classical music thread...
My favourite composer is Handel. That was before he teamed up with Hinge and Bracket to form The Doors...
I went to my local music store and asked 'what do have by The Doors?' He said, 'a bucket of sand and a fire blanket'.
My favourite composer is Handel. That was before he teamed up with Hinge and Bracket to form The Doors...
I went to my local music store and asked 'what do have by The Doors?' He said, 'a bucket of sand and a fire blanket'.
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- Boatbuilder
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Re: Jokes
Good ones, Bertie.
"You can't change history as that won't change the future"
John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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- Anita Bensoussane
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Re: Jokes
"Heyho for a starry night and a heathery bed!" - Jack, The Secret Island.
"There is no bond like the bond of having read and liked the same books."
- E. Nesbit, The Wonderful Garden.
Society Member
"There is no bond like the bond of having read and liked the same books."
- E. Nesbit, The Wonderful Garden.
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- Courtenay
- Posts: 19320
- Joined: 07 Feb 2014, 01:22
- Favourite book/series: The Adventure Series, Galliano's Circus
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- Location: Both Aussie and British; living in Cheshire
Re: Jokes
Ohhh nooooo...
Actually, those just reminded me of another one (I may actually have got it from here originally, but that was a while ago if so):
The inaugural Devon and Cornwall Music Festival has been cancelled. They couldn't decide whether The Jam or Cream should go on first.
Actually, those just reminded me of another one (I may actually have got it from here originally, but that was a while ago if so):
The inaugural Devon and Cornwall Music Festival has been cancelled. They couldn't decide whether The Jam or Cream should go on first.
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It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
It was a nuisance. An adventure was one thing - but an adventure without anything to eat was quite another thing. That wouldn't do at all. (The Valley of Adventure)
- Boatbuilder
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Re: Jokes
To repeat what you said, Courtenay - Ohhh nooooo...
Incidentally, which way round did they go onto your scones, when you were down there recently?
Incidentally, which way round did they go onto your scones, when you were down there recently?
"You can't change history as that won't change the future"
John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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John's Pictures of Suffolk - https://suffolk-world.com/
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